18th September 2008

There is a small French town near Metz which has just voted to change its name. To an English eye there doesn't seem much wrong with the name of Vantoux, but to the 320 households in the affected commune it signified the name 'vandals', with all the connotations thereby. So, by due process, on Tuesday night the new name for the inhabitants was changed by the municipal council to Vantousiens. The nine hundred residents who voted for the change were ecstatic, saying that for too long too many visitors were coming to the town expecting to meet the wrong kind of people. However, there were some residents who were inevitably disappointed; people like the local coffee shop owner had actually been proud that their town's name had been a point of debate, attracting tourists to the region.
Of course, with the current free-flow of people across Europe, with the pot pourri of languages pouring forth, there is even greater scope for confusion and even hilarity. Who could forget the TV programme the other night with Charley Boorman racing across Europe, and his chance encounter with that unfortunate fellow called Farti! No doubt in his native language (was it Turkish?), his name would have been normal, but to an English ear it is hysterically funny. Here in France there are the well-known places causing inevitable humour like Condom - a town near here - and a small town called Optare. Him indoors laughed when asking directions (no, not up-dere...). But the worst example of cross-language hilarity was caused yesterday when we received a leaflet in our mailbox from the local wine merchant. After all, which English resident in their right mind would want to display in his wine cellar a bottle called 'Arse'. I kid you not!