18th April 2016

Just returned from a breathless trip to N.W. England. Visited a lovely place called St. Annes. On the outward route Gaillac to Toulouse, the final access road to Blagnac airport was blocked off. There was a yellow Diversion sign, but it only indicated 'Peripherique' - no mention of the airport. Typical.  Anyway, just about managed to reach the airport in time. We arrived in Bristol, being the only non-stop flight we could get from Toulouse, then hired a car. Big mistake. Knowing our frailties, the only car they had with a GPS system was an expensive BMW, so we took it. However: no driver manual at all, no handbrake, no key slot (you had to just drop the key into a hole before pressing the start button), internal door handles had to be pressed twice to open and the GPS was in German! Complicated locking system: the front doors would lock, but the back doors were still open! Eventually we set off, but soon discovered the sound system was so low we couldn't hear the voice at all! 8h later (on a 4h journey), even a sympathetic techno-friend took one hour to adjust the sound. The only word Him indoors knows in German is Schadenfreude - somehow think the Germans were taking a certain pleasure in our misfortune. How to get my own back? Read Vichyssoise - now available for pre-order from Amazon. That should do it.

26th September 2010

Our son is here for 2 weeks!
Blagnac airport at Toulouse has changed beyond all recognition since our last visit. Must have been that nasty letter I sent them last year. The arrivals hall no longer has that baggage claim area where the man off the street could saunter in and take bags directly off the revolving carousel before arriving passengers get through passport control! Whilst waiting for the plane to land, I also noticed the brand new litter bins, complete with different 'green' sections for separating your waste coffee cups from newspapers from other dechets...trouble is, the inside was just one large plastic bag, to be disposed of all together!
Yesterday we went on a treasure hunt in the nearby village of Laguepie (literally means 'the wasp' - the locals must have known something). Anyway, it was v. entertaining. It's a global treasure hunt, which you co-ordinate to any area in the world from your cell phone. As we followed instructions, a clue came up: 'detruit par les ducs de joyeuse' (destroyed by dukes of pleasure). We looked up and saw a ruined castle. Sure enough, as we climbed up the hill, the cell phone beeped - 20m to go. And, there was the 'treasure' tucked in a hole in the crumbling wall. Inside a small box was a notebook and pencil to record our message and date and treasure we could exchange for our own. I left a pen.
If you want to play, go to: geocaching.com
Bien amusant.

20th September 2009

I'm back! Somehow I'm still in one piece, but I don't know how. On Friday, me and 'him indoors' returned to France from a great trip to the USA, but the return journey was a complete disaster. Don't get me wrong - the planes landed safely, but everything else that could go wrong, did. The American end of the flight ran smoothly enough. The trouble started at the changeover at Heathrow. We were very tired at the London customs point and almost didn't notice the beep as we walked through the customs xray door. But now I understand why Diana Ross made all that fuss several years ago. For some reason we were both roughly body-searched. Yes - us - an ordinary couple in our 60s. Then, whilst struggling to put on our shoes and other outerwear, a rude second official said, and I quote, 'if you don't hurry up and move your bags from the belt, I won't be responsible for my actions!' When we finally boarded the European flight, we - along with the rest of the passengers - sat for some time listening to a horrendous 'sawing' noise coming from one of the engines. Eventually, the pilot said there was a fault and that we'd all have to get off the plane and wait for another one to be made ready. But, shouldn't the engineers have checked everything before we all boarded?? And, had the second plane been checked? Didn't fill nervous fliers like me with much confidence. Two very weary passengers arrived at Blagnac, Toulouse after 10 hours travelling without any sleep, only to find our checked baggage missing - the only ones from the whole flight! Had they gone astray in the US, at Heathrow or here? As usual, no officials in sight as we frantically tried to locate them. Eventually I spotted a BA stewardess and she explained to me. The monitors that showed that our flight's baggage had gone to belt 2 did not refer to those, like us, who had made a connecting flight from somewhere else! Oh - I should have realised that??? Our bags were sitting all on their own on a completely different belt, but as I struggled to put them at last on our trolley, a customs official appeared from nowhere and asked me what was in my cardboard box. I told him it was a new pool cover bought in the US. Where is the receipt? I didn't know or care. But, when I told him the price in dollars, he shrugged and said O.K. waving us on and out of the airport. You think that was the end of it? No. When we went to the carpark payment machine, we discovered a horrendous charge because, whilst we were away, our usual P2 park had changed from long-stay to a daily rate.
Sometimes I wonder why we go on holiday at all! Oh well, c'est la vie!

17th May 2009

This last week has been one of mayhem, confusion and embarrassment, with a liberal sprinkling of double-entendre. Where to start? I had booked a club outing to nearby Caylus with two of my Canadian book 'fans'. Thought the date was the 12th. So, when our vegetarian son arrived, I asked the club if he could come. Answer: no, because the French caterer (like most French) thinks that to be vegetarian is un catastrophe. But, after cancelling, I found that the actual date was the 14th, a day after our son went home, so I called the club to reinstate the booking. But then our Canadian friend Bill became seriously ill and is now in intensive-care in Villefranche. Yet again, I had to contact the club to cancel! Embarrassment all-round. Added to this, I discovered a fraud on my online bank account. Someone had kindly removed £500 from my account to put a bet on at Ladbrokes!! Him indoors calmly asked if the horse won! Have therefore been going to-and-fro between the bank and the local Gendarmerie - something not to be recommended in a foreign language.
On Wednesday we returned our son to Blagnac airport. Inching up to the narrow barrier, the screen said Complet - full. So, after a few muttered 'merdes' (no translation necessary), I reversed along the narrow channel to promptly crash into an unseen stone kerb, damaging the door sill. We drove again around the airport, saw a digital sign now saying 6 places available, so returned, only to be met with Complet yet again! I tried arguing with the unknown man via the barrier audio control, who merely directed us to the only available spaces in car park P5. However...two French camion lorries were digging up the entire P5 access road. Our son calmly said 'that'll be why they've got spaces'.
I'm sure the French have a saying for all this. Mine? Unprintable in any language.