16th April 2023

 I’d searched far and wide for a UK spa treatment to realign my facial muscles after Bell’s Palsy, but didn’t find what I was looking for. All seemed to cater for young people or the super fit, with treadmills, bikes etc. I don’t look good in Lycra!  And the advertised prices were for one afternoon, per person. When I multiplied that by 2 people for 7 days, it was so dear that we decided to look further afield. At last, the perfect place, but an inconvenient time. Decision? Our health was more important. A very talented masseuse used warm Indian oils - a practice a thousand years old - concentrating on each side of my face and the back of my head and neck, whilst soothing Indian music lulled me into a trance-like state. (Afterwards, my oiled hair made me look like Ken Dodd!). OH had deep tissue treatment in the same room, with panoramic sea views. So, where did we go to find the perfect spa plus temperatures of 33C?  Politically and monetarily it’s in Europe, but not geographically! Answer below. Here are some photos to give you a clue (the 3rd one was the view from our hotel room). And my face?  Well, I was never gonna look like Penelope Cruz, but my eyebrows are at last in line - for now at least.

Answer:  Lanzarote.

9th April 2023

 Normal service will resume asap.

2nd April 2023

 Last night huge flames from a neighbour’s garden bonfire were as high as our roof, embers on our fence and trees, but what did our Council/police/firemen do? Nothing. Elsewhere, our suburbs have been narrowed out of existence. Previously thriving shopping streets are now ghost towns, their customers prevented from getting anywhere near. Non-electric vehicles have been outlawed. Parking, even if you can find a spot, is a joke. Meters are being replaced by apps, causing mayhem. Twice now, parking in the same spot and paying by app, we returned to see a yellow penalty notice stating “you haven’t displayed a parking voucher on the windscreen.” The app company had wrongly recorded the street around the corner as our parking position, so the Council parking attendant thought we hadn’t paid!  Each blames the other. Electric vehicles too are a problem. Because charging them can take hours, a van driver left his vehicle charging overnight only to find the following morning that he’d been charged(!) with overstaying at the charging point. How are already-overladen power stations going to cope with all the extra demand? You’ll need a second mortgage to replace the battery, and your life’s at risk if you end up in a river. City life today. We’re all in deep water.

26th March 2023

 Aux barricades! The French are revolting - so the King’s visit has been postponed. Over the 12 years we lived in France, the French were always protesting about something. Phrases like gilets jaune have become commonplace. In many ways I found the French to have a sense of personal entitlement far exceeding that of the ‘lowly’ English. Along with the excellent French health system, their amazing carte vitale having personalised medical history encryption, their pension system is generous. Many French retirees receive 50% of their working salary. Claude, our erstwhile French neighbour in 2005, was able to take full retirement at the age of 55 from his job as an electrician with the EDF service, on two very generous state and occupational pensions. He lived the life of Riley, installing an indoor pool in his bungalow. Every day we saw him pootling around on his top of the range ride-on mower. But now, his countrymen are protesting loudly that, for entirely sensible economic reasons, Macron is moving the retirement age goalposts. So our King must wait. Otherwise, like past French royalty, he would be sent to the Bastille. Allons enfants de la patrie…

To read more about our tumultuous life with the French: mybook.to/Ed2paradis

19th March 2023

 It’s Mothering Sunday today in the UK. Such a lot has happened since first I became a mother, but the greatest change has been the rise of IT. Whole new social rules have sprung up. I can tell immediately the likely age of an email sender by the use of punctuation, spelling and correct grammar!  And woe betide an emailer using capital letters - anger personified.  My biggest email worry is not noticing a huge mistake until after I’ve sent it. Once sent it’s too late. Forwarding can be useful, especially with attachments but, as I’ve learnt to my cost, always check before sending that there’s not something incriminating underneath! But even with fixed phone lines, there’ve also been social changes.  These days, only old people seem to use them. When I was young, our first fixed line was a party-line, but no parties were ever arranged thereby. It was strictly for serious matters only. In fact, on the few occasions it rang, someone surely must have died. Ironically, today’s young people feel the same, but for different reasons. All their social interractions are via the ubiquitous cell phone, used on the go outside, even risking life and limb whilst crossing the road. Heaven forbid that, if killed by so doing, the family fixed line at home should actually ring with the dire news. To mothers everywhere, enjoy your day.

12th March 2023

I was reading about how many people, women and men, now use invasive cosmetic procedures as a weapon against ageing. Personally, now that I’ve recovered from my second bout of Bell’s Palsy, I’m so glad that my facial muscles, frowns and all, are actively working again. No way I’d want to stop that. But the truth is: what people really want is not to grow old and not to die. No amount of cosmetic enhancements will change that. I sometimes wonder why adults don’t revert to wearing school uniform in the relentless drive to fool themselves they’re still young. When I see 80 year old popstars on stage, I laugh at their foolishness.  The way we look at ourselves as a society needs to change. Somewhere along the line, we stopped revering the older generation. Years ago, young people would naturally turn to their grandparents for the wisdom they gleaned over their long life. Back then, grey hair and wrinkles were not seen as things to be erased but to be relished. They were signs that they’d reached that coveted stage in life where they’d passed their apprenticeship. Ancient civilisations knew this subliminally, fêting their elders for what they’d achieved, and glorying in their hard-won life education. Forget what you look like to others. Beauty comes from within. Embrace the wisdom.

5th March 2023

 Life today is difficult.  Yes, I know that home comforts have increased by leaps and bounds since the 1950s.  And just look at how wonderful it is to be able to ‘Whatsapp’ with our adult children living in the US, as we did yesterday.  But despite all of this, I still sigh.  Some say that my generation has lived through more technological change over the past 50 years than anyone before. And, I admit to being grateful that iphone cameras weren’t around in my teens to incriminate me now!  But today it’s the lack of courtesy and consideration for others which gets me down, good manners clearly not taught by parents or schools any more. Old people are rarely offered a seat on public transport, bags often occupying places for passengers, and in the literary world, if agents or publishers aren’t interested in your long-prepared submission, no response is sent at all. Some years ago I was walking home from work, wandering a little on the pavement through tiredness, when a jogger suddenly zoomed past me from behind, screaming at me to get out of the way!  And don’t start me on road rage. When did good manners fly out of the window? These days, in the cut and thrust of modern living, everyone has their own agenda,  stabbing in the back anyone who gets in their way. My message to them? Wait until you’re old.